Star-Spangled, Grace-Filled Independence

Here's what we did in church yesterday to set up the message:



Hat tips to Billy Metzner on guitar, John Ivins on Independence and Dave Santella on the edit and upload.

I love my church.

Hello? - WE ARE MUSICIANS!

1. I drove Syd and Shannon to Dulles yesterday for their flight to Macedonia. What should have been a quick five hour turn-around took 10 hours. Hello, Friday on a July 4th weekend in DC traffic!
2. David had his first shopping experience at IKEA, since we had to pull over somewhere to rest. And there it was - a huge blue box of comfort and joy and air conditioning! $300 later, our bellies were full of Swedish goodness (cheap, good food!) and we were ready for the next leg of the Never Ending Drive.
3. Did I mention that Big Red's A/C was only blowing hot air? And that it was 96 degrees yesterday? That'll wear you out.
4. We listened to Christmas music during the drive. For the first time in years, I am excited about Christmas at PCC! Planning ahead is good!
5. IKEA purchases were for the store, so when we hit Powhatan around 11PM, we went directly to Powhatan Music & Sound to have fun with allen wrenches. I love IKEA picture people.
6. Found Tony, Jim Wheeler and Daniel at the end of THEIR 14-hour day. They were as tired as we were, but they had A/C.
7. I put together three chairs and stocked reeds and strings. This took several hours.
8. At 2:30AM, David started saying, "Mom - are you sleepy? I'm not sleepy. Not at all. But we could go home. But if we do, I'm just gonna watch tv. I'm not sleepy. Are you sleepy? I'm not sleepy."
9. We came home around 3:30AM. My boys worked hard. I am so proud of them.
10. I spent another 30 minutes printing some materials for this morning.

This means that I went to sleep around 4AM, as did the proprietor of Powhatan Music. And yes, it's opening day - and you would think that we would be there at the break of dawn to be cleaning up and readying the place. But we are night owls - hello? - we are musicians!!! - and we did all that last night.

So, Mom and Dad - this is why, when you called at 8:30AM, we were indeed still asleep. But no worries: it's 10:30, the store is open and we're headed into another 20-hour day!

And life is good.

P.S. The Macedonia team arrived safely. Yay!

Time Flies - Macedonia 2011

Syd with a Roma girl two years ago in Macedonia

Shannon and Syd leave for Macedonia tomorrow.

Sarah has been in Europe for two weeks already.

My, how time flies.

These girls - my babies - have grown up and embraced the opportunity to fly, literally. They are pouring parts of themselves into other people, across the globe, in places foreign to them.

I have set this aside and tried not to think about it, really, because if I think about it, I am overwhelmed. There is little fear or anxiety anymore -just a general, maternal, "Please be safe..." panic that ebbs and flows. I have learned that they will go, and that is that. I pray for protection and miracles and simply learn to lean into a trust that I've yet to develop, but one that is there when needed.

Seems these sorts of character issues grow out of necessity. You don't even realize it's there until you look back a recognize how it was pressured into existence.

Syd wrote this tonight:

God, you are good. So good. You have entrusted me, labeled me as one of your own, and sent me out into this world. You have honored me with a partnership with you and the Roma people. This week it is my prayer that you move through me. That your light shines through every pore in my body. That I become a ball of inextinguishable fire for you and your greater purpose. Let healing begin this week, eradicate all injustice and pain. Begin to blend the line between heaven and earth so that the Romani experience what true, unchanging, eternal love is. What your love is. This week give us the ability to soften Romani hearts so that you can mold them. See you in Skopje.

Shannon with a Roma friend in 2009

Parenting Tips

 

 I'm blown away tonight after looking at an array of photos that showed all of the teams serving in Chesapeake this week with World Changers. My kids have been part of a World Changers trip every year since we started coming to PCC.

I am convinced that their investment in these trips (and mine) has been one of the most formative experiences of their lives. They have learned things and experienced things that I never could have taught or shown them.

They are better people for it.

It's been tough. The first few years, especially, when I'd yet to experience that acquired parental ability to trust that they'd be safe (and alive) while they were out of my sight. See, as they have grown, so have I. Trust and patience and peace have grown in me as I let them slip out of my sight.

They have have transformative experiences on these trips, and it's made a huge difference in the young men and women they are becoming.

This year, only Syd and Daniel were able to go to the local trip; they served this week in Chesapeake, working 10-hour days to put on roofs and weed flowers and fix landscaping and whatever else needed doing. They served people who needed a hand. Next week Sydni will take another World Changers trip, accompanied this time by Shannon, going to Macedonia in Eastern Europe to serve the Roma people.

My kids are world changers, but they've been changed, too. And I firmly believe it's one of the best things I've done as a parent.

I looked at the pictures and was blown away; out of the 16 groups that served this week, you can find PCC faces in every group. We sent 90 people to Chesapeake this week, and they changed the world. But they're changed, too, and they're coming home.

I imagine they're bringing some change with them.

Daniel's World Changers Team

Syd's World Changers Team

Surprised By Grief

I need to remember this
So give me one last kiss
And let me take a long last look
Before we say goodbye


I carried a basket of clean clothes into my bedroom and started to methodically pair up the socks. A familiar melody began to stream from the speakers in the corner, and my throat tightened.


Remember when the days were long
And rolled beneath a deep blue sky
Didn't have a care in the world...

I sat on the edge of the bed, a thin crew sock clutched in my hand, and the tears came. It seemed like such an awkward, unbidden moment; the tendons tightened in my neck as I fought against a wave of raw, naked sorrow.

I was folding socks. I'd just eaten lunch, worked on some financial aid forms with my daughter, started the washing machine. Where did this come from?

It's a beautiful, glorious day - the sky is, indeed, a deep blue, and I am busy, for sure, and a little stressed, for sure. But why this gut-wrenching grief that causes me to lean on the dresser while tears fall, because I hardly think I can stand? Why now? Why this moment?

No reason, I suppose, except the familiar strains of a melody and a surge of memory; a cd, a box set, lent to me with care. Friends sharing favorite music. A flashback to a concert and a song sung; a partnership, a singer and his accompanist, a struggling girl and a warrior.

And a raw, gaping wound of loss. What it means to be without.

The end of the innocence.

Hurt is deepest when the love has been strongest. It is this season, I suppose, where my years have caught up with some of what I thought I already knew, and now I know things in my soul to which I have, up til now, only given intellectual assent.

I know that missing somebody is a pain indescribable.

I know that joy can live with sorrow, two sides of the same coin. Two chords in the same song.

I know that one day, I will grieve again. I cannot escape.

I know the love of a man strong and true, and I know that the future will bring a day when one of us will be left to mourn. And it will tear a ragged edge in the heart of that one, while the other soars to eternity. Part of the daily grace is bound in the knowledge that this is, indeed, until death do us part.

I know this loss, an acquaintance that I did not know prior to this great friendship. I am friends with this pain. My tears flow hot and humid, and I cannot swallow, and the clothes remain in a jumbled pile on the bed.

I know this loss, because I have also known this love, the friendship of a good man with a strong arms, good taste and the voice of a well-lived life. I would not trade that for any such happy-ever-after.

After Midnight We Gonna Let It All Sweat Out

It's after midnight - oops, make that closer to 1AM and I'm still up. So much going on - and I'm working until exhaustion and then starting all over again.

But I feel good. I miss my kids, the majority of whom are out of town (except for one who is diligently working). Life is so quiet without them. But (and don't tell them), I sure am being productive.

I am giving the message this weekend. I am really excited about it - it's very creative, in a way that suits me perfectly. Our teaching team has worked hard to coach and encourage one another and I got some great constructive criticism from them this week. I'm excited about kicking off our new series; it feels like a team effort!

By the way: I hesitated to write that last paragraph, because there's always this fear that if people know in advance that Brian's not on the platform, they won't come. Please tell me you'll come anyway, even though I spilled the beans!

I'm doing the message, and as we brainstormed about the closing song, some creativity lit up in my brain and I wrote something, which I'll take to Lindsay tomorrow morning and we'll work together to finish it out. I'm excited about THAT, too. Creative people LOVE creativity!

The music store is about nine days away from opening. Schedules are changing, there's lots of final touches and organization. We're doing a summer lesson program at Kidzalat Child Care Center and that's keeping me hopping.

And it's hot, and I'm sweating. I'm not sure how that is important enough to get into this blog post, but it's 1AM, I'm sitting in the dining room and sweat is literally dripping down my back. Maybe if I sit here long enough, I'll lose ten pounds.

My Momentum Conference Experience

Kent Singletary at MOMENTUM - great vision-caster!

I went to Nashville this week. Saw very little of the city - mostly sat in a conference room for three days. But there were some great benefits to this trip. In no particular order, here they are:

1. Road trip with Brian Hughes. All you need to know is this: donuts, crazy driving, several moments of purely hysterical laughter and constant starvation. Seriously, the guy is FUN.
2. Road trip with Susan Hughes. It's obvious that God is good, because he gave Susan to Brian. She is calm, cool, collected and incredibly wise. Also, tons of FUN - but without the donuts.
3. Road trip with Tony Stoddard. Serious, careful, maintainer of vehicles and lover of Dairy Queen. Seriously, the opportunity to spend over 10 hours in the car each way with my husband was a major win. Haven't seen much of him lately, so this was a nice second honeymoon. With Brian and Susan along for the ride. 
4. Sneaking into Jon Acuff's office after a tour of The Lampo Group. I didn't touch anything, just breathed in the fumes of funny.
5. Being around a workplace that honors God and loves people as it does business. Brilliant and inspiring.
6. Hearing a message of hope and freedom centered on money - still rocking my world. I am fascinated and am starting to see that God has been setting me up for this. Still processing.



Jon Acuff, in his office. Sort of.

7. Walking in the room to see Michael Easley. He is a minor celebrity in the Christian world - former president of Moody Bible Institute, now a teaching pastor at a big church in the Nashville area. But to me, he's the former pastor of Grand Prairie Bible Church, a preacher who sat with me in his office about 25 years ago and asked me one hard question, three times. I lamented my circumstances at the time - confusion, some failed relationships, a lack of focus and purpose - and he said, "Let me ask you something: Is Jesus the Lord of your life?" I mumbled something about church attendance and singing in the choir, and he asked the same question again. I responded with the proud assertation that I didn't even work on Sundays before 1PM - and then he asked again: "Is Jesus the Lord of your life?" My life shifted that night when I surrendered my way to God's way, unable to shake the persistence and truth of his question. I traveled to Nashville in my role as a pastor - a leader - at my church, and I ran smack dab into the guy who pushed me towards Jesus way back when. There's been a lot of water under and over the bridge since then - but that moment - and that question - were pivotal in my life. I wouldn't have been there this week if Mike Easley hadn't been there in Grand Prairie 25 years ago, willing to ask a hard question and offend me. He did both, and I will be eternally grateful.

More about the trip, what we learned and what we'll be sharing in the future - but let me assure you of this: God has put us on a path towards something that will completely transform not only our church but our community. This is the thing; it's what we've been waiting for. It was confirmed for me several times, in several ways.

I'm ready.

Dave Ramsey on air

The entrance to The Lampo Group Office