(By the way - I had second thoughts about my most recent post - not because of the content, but because of the title.
I HATE EVERYBODY.
I changed the title, because I became a little bit sensitive to the notion of people attaching I HATE EVERYBODY with my work, or my workplace. It's rather unbecoming, in certain contexts.
So I changed the title, but guess what: Blogger doesn't change titles once you've hit 'publish'! So it lives on, in infamy.)
June says, I appreciate your blog and I said, Oh, well...you know...it's been a hard week...
And then we both cried for a while and everything was better.
And it's the truth; everything IS better. Life sucked me back into its vortex of joy and busy and people.
And that's it, really. It's people.
And it's the little things, the texts and messages of support - but mostly, the conversation, around a table, or standing in the hallway, or in the donut shop. It's the reality of dialogue about life and the future and sorrow and grief. It's our stories, shared with one another.
It's seeing the bigger picture, and realizing that we're all in this together, even as we slog through our separate paths. The human condition leaves us, ultimately, alone - but the journey is one we can share as we listen; as we empathize, and listen, and reflect back, and listen some more.
I was heard today, even as I opened my ears and heard others, and it's fascinating to me, that the things I thought I needed to make me feel "okay" were of my own design and not necessarily the way that grace found me in this place, today. My biggest challenge - and I think this is true of many of us who walk this earth - is that I think I have it all figured out.
And the truth is that I am just as likely to stumble over some solution, some healing, some measure of joy - just as likely to accidentally fall into grace as I am to talk myself into it. Or figure it out myself.
I listened to a friend today, as she shared her story of wrestling with a new season of life; a desire to find meaningful work, to move forward, to explore new things. What I heard was that she was focused on the details and the immediate, and that she needed to rise above and see the bigger picture. I reflected that back to her - not as advice, but as this is what I hear you saying and I encouraged her to think about what the bigger picture might be, to decide what was important, where her passions lay, and move in that direction.
That's all well and good, and true for her, in this moment. But for me, right now? It's a heck of a thing.
I thought I had it all figured out; I knew what I needed.
But healing came from a surprising place. And tonight, there is such joy in my heart - and I am in such a different place than just 48 hours ago.
It helps that I am witness, from the side lines, to exchanges like these:
Hello panic - a stolen car? Really?
|My favorite part is Daniel's loving question: "ARE YOU ON DRUGS?"|
|It still makes me laugh, out loud, even thought I've read it six times.|
It's awesome, really; my kids have a group chat labeled 'The Fam', and the random things that come through are fascinating. After that exchange, we got a short video from a blues bar and a random shot of people dancing to the theme from 'Car Wash'.
This is the life my family lives, and they share it with me.
Healing comes from surprising places. I'm grateful for it.