Sunday, December 30, 2012

The Time That I Have Left, It's All I Have Of Worth

Beautiful art installation at the chuch
It snowed again last night, and more fell lightly this morning as I walked through the parking lot towards this church that was once home, once my workplace; this refuge, this place of grace and grace and grace upon grace.

I saw a few people I knew; warm hugs and greetings and quick family updates, although in this day and age of Facebook status updates, most of us know the bare minimum about one another's lives. It's easy to reconnect.

I found a seat close to the front - second row, because I am easily distracted, and I do not want to be - and the service began.

You make all things work together for my good

Of course, You do.

And as I sang, my heart whispered 'and for Your glory' at the end of every line.

The worship pastor is an excellent musician on several instruments, but he sat at the piano today. He played and my soul felt it's worth, truly; I was drawn towards a place of expectant submission in worship. From the seats, with no agenda, no plan, no idea of the music, I was ready to be led, and my ears focused on his fingers on the keys and I was there. I trusted what he played, how he played, how he didn't play, the spaces in between, and everything I am - musician, worshiper - converged and I was not distracted and I was in the presence of God.

I heard a powerful message; four points, emphasis on an awareness of sin and brokenness as a propelling force for a most urgent mission: to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and to love your neighbor as yourself.

And then they began the closing song, one I had heard of but never heard in worship.

This time that I have left, it's all I have of worth
I lay it at your feet, Lord; it's less than you deserve
And though I've little strength, and though my days are few
You gave your life for me, so I will live my life for you

Here I am, take me
As an offering
Here I am, giving
Every heartbeat for your glory

And at the end, the constant refrain began, pulled straight from the heart of worship that resounds from Isaiah to Revelation:

Worthy, worthy
You are worthy
Worthy is the Lord

Over and over and over and my hands lifted high, and I never wanted it to stop, because I was there and that's all I wanted to say.


Anonymous said...

It was so lovely to see you today! Happy New Year, dear Beth.

Lori said...

Beautiful indeed.
Peace and blessings.