Monday, October 13, 2014

31 Songs: Poison And Wine

Is it possible to see your life in two very separate but closely aligned places?

Is it possible to feel so at home and settled in two different towns - at the same time?

Is it possible to believe that you belong in one place and yet belong, just as much, in another?

The truth is this: There is ego, and it longs to be satisfied. There is affirmation that seems a necessary thing. We lie to ourselves, all the time.

But in the midst of the selfishness is a resounding truth that cannot be ignored.

Many truths, in fact.

There is family, the tug from all directions.

There is the arc of memory, the feel of the road and the knowledge of every curve.

There is the sweet sticking point of moments that marked turning points, points of no return, the very place the paradigm shifted.

There is the sense that the soul was knit together in certain surroundings, and that it truly and finally came to life when it returned.

I'm reading and living in the midst of a book called Yes, And these days, and though I find great comfort in the theological context of what leaks into my soul out of Rohr's writing, it seems to be causing more consternation in the tangible circumstances of my own life.

So the song, the one singing itself, is a definitive pronouncement of what is. And what is not. And the strange, compelling dissonance of what, in this moment, seems to be tugging at my heart.

I don't love you but I always will
I don't love you but I always will
I don't love you but I always will
I don't love you but I always will

Have you ever wanted to be in two places at the same time?

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