Thursday, August 13, 2009

Do You Roll Your Eyes At This?

At the risk of accusations of being a Puritan, a hypocrite or worse, I'm going to post here a few statements made in answer to the question, "If there was one thing you would want to tell women about dressing modestly, what would it be?" (Excerpts from a post by Anne Jackson)

They impacted me strongly, as they should have.

What do you think? Do most women even think about stuff like this when they are choosing their clothing?

“I know that women probably roll their eyes a lot when they hear to dress modestly, but seriously, its a huge help. A. Huge. Help. Look, if you are an attractive woman, you are right, you cant control where guys' thoughts go. But you dont have to help them get there quicker. A lot of us are really trying, and small skirts or deep cleavage just sets us back, no matter how strong we are."

“Cover the cleavage. It’s intoxicating, they’re wonderful but I should really concentrate on my wife’s and not yours.”

“My sister, when it comes to being tempted visually, I am your much weaker brother. I would humbly ask, as you exercise your wonderful freedom in Christ, you would demonstrate grace and help me in my quest to live a life that honors our great God. YOU can help ME in my weakness.”

“If women knew the devastation that their immodesty could cause a man who is struggling with porn/lust (and his family), I think they might reconsider. ESPECIALLY in church….which should be a safe place for men to not have to dart their eyes every 2 seconds.”

“I would tell them about my husband’s former struggles with pornography and fantasy, about how much we underestimate the power we have over helping or hindering our brother’s walks with God, and the marriages of our sisters and how much a glance at another woman’s cleavage is heartbreaking to a wife."

“You don’t understand the intensity with which men are compelled in and battle these things…not giving us more to mentally work with does not win our battle (nor does dressing provocatively lose it) but simply being thoughtful in how you dress and doing your best to help us see who you are instead of how your body looks is greatly appreciated.”

“If you are a Christ-follower, please understand the lust issues that men face. It is difficult enough for us to stay mentally pure.”

You can find the full posting here. Props to Anne Jackson for addressing issues like this.


Mrs. G.I. Joe said...

That's all very interesting. I think so many women want to dress in a way that would be "appealing" but maybe not necessarily to the point of causing lust. But that comes from wanting attention and fulfilment that should be coming from their relationship with God, and not what men think of their appearence.

I think the best code of dressing, whether for modesty or to actually look presentable in any way, is to dress your size! Nobody wants to see clothes multiple sizes too small, and that goes for on men as well.

Chances are, if you are wearing an appropriate size for your body then being modest and presentable. Seems simple, but I think its a principal that's lost on a lot of people in this world!

Patty P said...

Good call on addressing this issue, as a guy I can tell you we struggle to not notice things but, when it's in your face it's that much easier to have wandering eyes.

Anonymous said...

Nice to hear that someone is thinking of modesty these days. With the coming fashion of see through clothing, I think men are in for another onslaught. I respect myself enough to want to keep what I have for myself and my husband. It's not for sale, so why advertise it?
B. K. Kerr

Anonymous said...

Many women dress to look appealing to their husbands. Ask yourself, if you are appealing to your husband, how many teenage young men are you also appealing to? As a mature man who struggles with this, I can tell you that there are enough distractions in the "world" without having to deal with it in the church as well.

Bill said...

Hey....great post. Couldn't help but notice that my cousin (B>K> Kerr had I called her up and we talked for a half hour! Thanks for continueing to be you. your honesty is a blessing to us all who read you.